Ep. 3 – Intern 1

“OH CRAP! OH CRAP! OH CRAP! WE’RE GONNA DIE!”

Intern 1 fires wildly over his shoulder, his twin laser pistols blasting neon bolts into the jungle night.

“BISCUIT! I’LL COVER YOU! GET TO THE SHIP!”

The cowboy penguin—Biscuit, as it turns out—trips over a root, rolls, and keeps running without looking back.

“THIS IS HOW IT ENDS!” Intern 1 yells, ducking behind a half-destroyed alien fruit cart. “DEATH BY ANGRY SPACE CANNIBALS!”

Back in the present...

Cowboy Penguin turns back to Intern 27. “Oh right. Should’ve mentioned. My real name’s Biscuit. Didn’t want you to get confused mid-flashback.”

He turns back to the wall. “Anyway. Where was I? Oh yeah. Screaming and fleeing for my life.”

Back on Spinden—fast-forward a bit...

“BISCUIT! I’LL COVER YOU!”

Biscuit runs like a penguin possessed, flapping frantically toward the spaceship parked on a moss-covered landing pad. Laser blasts whizz by as he slides inside.

“I GOTTA GET OUTTA HERE!” he shrieks, slamming random buttons.

The ship roars to life.

Intern 1, still behind cover, watches the ship begin to rise. “Once Biscuit loops back around, I’ll blast these bastards into the next dimension.”

The ship lifts off.

“…Wait.”

It keeps going. Higher. Farther.

“I WANT TO LIIIIIIIIIVE!” Biscuit screams inside the cockpit, full-on panic mode, face smooshed against the controls.

The aliens close in around Intern 1.

He doesn’t scream anymore. He doesn’t run.

He stares up at the sky with dead eyes and clenched fists.

“…He left me.”

The aliens stop, confused by the shift in energy.

Intern 1 stands up slowly, cracking his neck.

“Oh... now I’m pissed.”

Until next time...